Sleeping with a man 20 years older than you is a wonderful thing—as long as it’s done the right way. If you play your cards right, this difference in age can actually make for a better relationship than you would have with someone closer to your own age. With that in mind, here are some do’s and don’ts for making sure it all goes down smoothly—you’ll be glad you did!
1: It’s Not Wise To Pressurise Him Into Proposing To You
When you sleep with a man 20 years older than you, you have to accept that it’s not wise to pressurise him into proposing to you. For some people, this is the right choice, but for others, it’s an unrealistic expectation.
Pressurising a man into marriage is never going to end well. The only thing this does is make both sides unhappy without actually bringing about the desired outcome. It’s important to be realistic about what you want from it and how it will affect your life. If he’s happy being single, then don’t push him into the role of husband because you think it will make life easier. Don’t expect him to be ready to settle down just because you are. You need to ask yourself if you like the person he is today or whether you want to change him into someone else entirely.
If he isn’t ready and willing to commit, then don’t take his lack of commitment personally. Think about why he might be reluctant before getting upset or hurt by his rejection of your desire for him to be your husband.
2: Enjoy Your Youthful Days And Encourage Him To Have Fun Along With You
You may be wondering, as you read this, whether this is a good idea. After all, you’re 20 years younger than he is. What do you have in common? How do you have fun doing the same things? The truth is, there are plenty of things you can do together. He’s been living longer and has more experience than you have, so ask him for advice on how to spend your time—he may know some places to visit or can offer tips on how to enjoy your youth while it lasts. He’ll probably appreciate your youthful energy, too.
3: Don’t Constantly Poke Or Make Him Feel Bad About His Age When Trying Exciting Activities
If your boyfriend is 20 years older than you, he may be more inclined to want to relax and watch Netflix after work rather than try a new activity. However, because you are young and want to keep challenging yourself, you may feel that this is a good opportunity for you two to step out of your comfort zones.
If you’re trying to convince him to join you in an activity, think about why he might not be interested, and try to persuade him with those reasons. If it’s because he’s older and has a different taste in activities, let him know that this can be a fun new activity for both of you that could maybe even grow on him over time and become something the two of you like. Be willing to try things out with him just because they sound like they could be fun.
4: Do Not Force Him To Have Children
If you’re sleeping with a man 20 years older than you, make sure not to force him to have children—he may be ready for fatherhood, but that’s something that should come from his own desires.
You’re a lot of things if you’re sleeping with this man—you’re strong, independent, beautiful, and in some cases stubborn. But what you are not is wise. You’ve got your own set of experiences and know the world through your own eyes, but he’s lived two decades more than you and knows the world through his eyes. He’s been where you haven’t, done things you haven’t, and made decisions that have shaped him as a person—and sometimes those decisions were based on the fact that he knew more than you did. He’s had time to grow into who he is meant to be, so hearing him out on why he makes the choices he does can pay off in big ways.
But when it comes to having children, hear him out the most; because no matter how old and wise he may seem, if he hasn’t had kids before now it means one thing: he hasn’t wanted them yet. Your relationship has only begun to develop and has been molded by your insights into each other so far—you
5: Others’ Opinions Of Who You Should Date Shouldn’t Matter To You
If the idea of sleeping with a man 20 years older than you is distasteful, you shouldn’t sleep with him. If it’s not, then that should be your only consideration, and there are no other opinions that should matter to you. You may want to know what other people think about this relationship, but their opinions can’t be a part of your decision-making process.
If you care about what they think, then you might be basing your decision on the wrong things: how other people see you or how it will affect the status quo. You might even be worried about something that hasn’t even happened yet—being judged by others for being in an intergenerational relationship. Like any relationship, an age difference one requires a certain amount of luck and some give-and-take; there will be times when one partner is more physically able and times when the other is more emotionally available, but as long as they make each other happy, who cares?
The only thing that should matter to you is what makes sense between you and your partner—if the age difference doesn’t bother either of you and you think it could work out well, then go for it!
6: Throw All Your Affection His Way And Make Him Feel Extra Special
When you’re sleeping with a man 20 years older than you, it’s easy to be intimidated. You might be wondering how you can give this person what you think they need, or if it’s possible to even think of yourself as their equal when you have such different life experiences—but the truth is, there are plenty of ways to give them exactly what they want without losing your identity.
For one thing, remember that in addition to being several years older than you (or more), they will also have a whole other life full of things they like and do. So don’t try to take over the entire relationship and put yourself in the position of being the sole focus in their life. Let them have their own interests and develop those parts of themselves; let them keep doing the things that bring them joys besides just being with you—and let yourself be part of those joys, too.
It’s not about making them love every second that they spend with you; it’s about how much you love being with them. If you can fill up some of their time with your own interests and your own friends, that will help balance out any feelings of intimidation or pressure from meeting someone who has more experience than you do.
7: Have A Clear Idea Of What You Want From The Relationship And From Him
Sleeping with a man who is 20 years older than you requires a level of awareness and self knowledge that may be difficult to achieve. If you’re not sure what you want from the relationship or from him, it could be problematic when you start to explore your feelings for each other. Are you hoping for a casual relationship? If so, this age difference may add complications if he wants more than that out of you. On the other hand, if your expectations are completely different, and he’s looking for something long-term while you’re only interested in a fling or no-strings attached relationship… then you may find yourselves in an incompatible situation as your relationship develops.
There is also the issue of whether he is on the same page as you, and whether his intentions are clear to both of you. He might have an idea of what he wants that differs from yours, and if there isn’t an open dialogue about it—if you let him believe one thing while your intentions are actually quite different—then he could end up getting hurt by your actions.
Sleeping with a man 20 years older than yourself isn’t for everyone, but if you’re thinking about it and want to proceed cautiously, make sure that neither of you has unrealistic expectations.
8: Enjoy Your Youthful Days And Encourage Him To Have Fun Along With You
When you are young and full of life, it is hard to imagine settling down with one person for the rest of your days. It may seem as though there is too much to see and do in this life, and you have plenty of time to settle down later. However, if you find yourself with a man 20 years older than you, you will find that it is different. You need to spend your best years living in the moment and enjoying the pleasures of youth. If you encourage him to be young with you, he will be more likely to stick around when he realizes how much fun life can be at any age.
9: Show That You Care About His Opinions
When you sleep with a man 20 years older than you, it’s very important to let him know that you care about what he thinks of you. If he’s just a number in your bed, he’ll think of you as just a number. And if someone regards you as nothing more than an object, they won’t really care much if they’re hurting your feelings—or if they’re doing something to hurt their own feelings—because they have no reason to.
However, if they see that you’re invested in them and their feelings, it will be hard for them to not reciprocate in kind. They’ll want to impress you and make you happy. A relationship where the people involved are growing together is always better for everyone than one where one person is growing and the other isn’t.
10: Compliment His Appearance
If you are sleeping with a man 20 years older than you, compliment his appearance. The purpose of this is to help him feel even more secure about the relationship. This will help him to relax and enjoy himself even more.
If you are going to speak about how he looks, find something nice. For example, my boyfriend has a couple of wrinkles on his face that look like they are there to stay, but I don’t mind them at all. I think they give him character. So instead of saying something like this: ‘You have wrinkles,’ say something like this: ‘I love your wrinkles they add character to your face.’ The first remark would probably make him feel a bit hurt and self-conscious about his looks, while the second one will make him feel good about himself and encourage him further in the relationship.
11: Be Yourself When You’re With Him
If you’re sleeping with a man 20 years older than you, be yourself when you’re around him, he won’t like you being pretentious. Pretending to be something you’re not is a waste of energy and will keep you from being able to relax and enjoy yourself.
Pretending to be someone else is a lot of work! It will feel like you have to monitor everything that comes out of your mouth if it doesn’t match up with the stereotypes surrounding your age difference, such as having intellectual conversations or listening to jazz music. If you aren’t interested in those things, don’t fake it! You’ll just be unhappy and drag everyone else who is with you down, too.
That’s all for now from the “Sleeping With A Man 20 Years Older Than You (11 Do’s And Don’ts)” content prepared by Victoria Milan for you! If you are looking for more content like this, you can visit our blog and stay tuned.
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FAQ About Sleeping With A Man 20 Years Older Than You
How Do You Tell If An Older Man Loves You?
How do you tell if an older man is in love with you? Unless you’re a psychic, it can be hard to tell. He may not say “I love you” back to you right away—or, at all. There are also a few signs that might indicate he loves you, though they can also be explained by other emotions, too. A combination of body language and actions can tell you if an older man is in love with you. However, don’t rule out the possibility that he’s just plain interested or attracted to you. Some men have trouble expressing their emotions and feelings verbally, so their non-verbal communication needs to be evaluated more closely.
Can older man love younger woman?
There are some people who believe that it is impossible for an older man to love a younger woman. The belief behind this statement is that the older man is using the young woman for her youth, and once she ages, the man will no longer be attracted to her. This is a common perception, but it is actually false. It is true that there are men in relationships with much younger women, but this proves nothing. There are also plenty of older women in relationships with younger men. In both instances, the relationship works because the two people involved truly love each other, not because of their age difference.
Do Older Guys Fall In Love Faster?
As men age, they become more likely to fall in love at first sight than younger men are—but only when they’re looking at women who fit their physical ideal. Men’s ideal partners may change as they get older and gain more experience with women. In their teens or early 20s, the male brain is wired to be attracted to the “cute” qualities in a female—youthful features, a certain look or attitude that’s considered sexy at that age. By the time guys reach their 30s or 40s, however, their minds are more receptive to other qualities in women.
